Moving on to the Big D (Discipline) – One of the foundations of Maria Montessori’s work was the concept of keeping the children safe from harmful behaviors and it is still the essence of the safe learning environment. Harmful behaviors are behaviors that hurt or threaten to hurt anyone in the community of learners or behaviors which completely disrupt the learning process. Teachers must set appropriate, firm and consistent limits on unsafe behaviors and follow the discipline techniques or behavior management system mandated by their program.

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff – There are many behaviors that may be annoying, irritating, distasteful, and unattractive, but they are NOT HARMFUL. So often teachers spend lots of time reacting to behaviors that need little or no reaction at all. This is a waste of time and attention, and often causes the minor infractions and annoying behaviors to increase.

You need to know the difference between behaviors that are harmful and truly disruptive of the learning process and those which may be considered negative, but are most often developmentally appropriate for the child’s age, cause little harm to the community or to the learning process, and are most often merely unattractive.

Remember, these are little people who put beans in their ears and remove things from their nostrils and hand them to you with pride. Manners are NOT their strong suit. Spend time and attention on truly harmful behaviors and treat the merely unattractive behaviors that my dear Southern mama insisted on calling, “unfortunate”, with little or no attention at all. Like Elsa, from Frozen, LET IT GO!”

Like They Do on Reruns of MASH and that Dr. McDreamy Show – Behavior “triage” is necessary and knowledge of child development milestones and familiarity with your program’s Strength Expectations (goals, standards, objectives) are the best assets in this process. Triage is usually used as a medical system of looking at injured, wounded, or ill persons and determining which of them needs to be cared for first. Behavior triage does the same thing.

‘Meh’ Behaviors – If a behavior is typical of a developmental phase, is necessary for development to continue to the next phase, does no damage or harm to a child, another person, materials, or equipment, and does not harm the learning process, other than being unattractive or irritating, (nose picking, all table manner issues, loud voices, giggling, not listening, etc.) there’s no need to deal with it as a big issue. Ignore it, distract from it, or calmly redirect the child’s attention to another action.

‘Ahem! or Psst! Behaviors – If a behavior is developmentally typical and necessary, but causes a disruption to the learning process, or minor harm to anyone or anything (sand or toy throwing at random, occasional running in line, interrupting when excited, whining, pushing or hitting without damage, coloring on walls or books, etc.) it needs to be dealt with appropriately by use of the methods in an appropriate behavior management system. Privately remind child of the rules and impose a consequence if repeated.

‘NO!’ Behaviors – If a behavior is not typical of normal development, is extreme and harmful to physical safety, and happens on a regular basis (throwing toys with aim, hitting, biting, scratching, pinching, running away, using threatening language) it must be dealt with immediately. FIRMLY STOP the action and remove the child or impose a consequence. If a truly harmful behavior recurs or increases in severity, both teachers and parents should begin to assess these behaviors to determine their cause and find a way to eliminate them with administrators supporting appropriate actions to be taken (referral to outside resources, curtailing attendance, or creating options in staffing).

Other than that they are very young and very human, there are many reasons for children to exhibit ugly behaviors. If there are consistent and continual harmful behaviors happening with an individual child, the teacher, parents, and possibly outside resource persons need to look at the causes in the three major learning areas of body, mind, and spirit.