Young children are naturally self-centered (not selfish – but self-centered) because this is the way we develop as humans. We grow and develop in the pattern of an archery target, with knowledge and concern for ourselves in the bullseye and that of others in the ever-widening areas.

When I say Humanity, I mean the art of gaining the social skills that move a child from the ‘self’ to the ever-widening circles of ‘others’. 

These skills are bonding, playing, acceptance, reading social cues, empathy, respect, turn-taking, making friends, cooperating, caring for others, and caring for the environment, and these skills are ENORMOUSLY important to growth as a Whole Person and they are not always easy to attain.

 To build the skills of Humanity using DAP, try to:

• Treat each and every child with warmth and care in a positive nurturing manner.
• Make bonding connections with each child by saying the child’s name in an affectionate, loving, and respectful manner as often as possible.
• Meet the needs of each child in terms of safety, security, protection, good health, good nutrition, and the use of Developmentally Appropriate Practice in educational, social, and emotional environmental facilitation.
• Offer daily experiences during which children may work, talk, share ideas and feelings, and interact with each other and the adults in whole group, small group, partner, and individual play. 
• Assure that one-third of the day is spent in child-chosen, child-led but adult-facilitated play experiences in which the adults play with the children on the physical level of the children.
• Understand that young children do not grasp the concept of sharing, but can be guided to take turns.
• Have more than one of the same toys for Babies and Toddlers, set up a timer for Twos and Threes, and ask Fours and Fives to use the clock to determine when to relinquish the toy to the other child.  This is REAL mastery of the skill of sharing or turn taking. 

The most vital teaching methods in this area are adult modeling of respectful, cooperative, empathetic behaviors and the creation of an affective environment that is safe, warm, and nurturing. So:

• Model the characteristics of empathy, respect, cooperation, and friendship in all communication and attitudes.
• Use, offer, and appropriately praise empathy, respect, cooperation, and friendship.
• Help children positively interact by keeping each child safe from harm physically and emotionally; by giving them the language needed to communicate and interact; by understanding that at some stages of development, social interaction is difficult; and by helping them understand how positive attitudes and behaviors increase opportunities for making friends.
   

EQ and IQ – A child who has a high EQ (Emotional Quotient) is one who can bond and play with others, learn to take turns, accept (neither shun nor be afraid of) others, empathize with the feelings or misfortunes of others, respect differences, work and play cooperatively most of the time, and make friends. This is a child well on his way to success in life. 

“I know there is strength in the differences between us. I know there is comfort, where we overlap.”
― Ani DiFranco

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