Prior blog talked about the importance of allowing your children access to their security items during the hours of preschool/day care attendance. The main reasons for this are to provide each child with the safety of personal security; to respect the child’s self esteem and his personal developmental level; to give each child ownership of his emotions; and to increase appropriate behaviors, because:

• You take my passie, it makes me sassy!
• You take my blankie, it makes me cranky!

I know ALL the reasons teachers have for not allowing toys, blankets, pacifiers, and bottles in the classroom. Distracting, too young for that, gets lost and parent gets mad, don’t have time or energy to keep up with fifteen or twenty little possessions, ya da ya da ya da.

So  – Some Laws for Lovies

1. Parents are informed up front that lovies are welcome if parents assist you by marking them with child’s name; understanding and reinforcing the Lovey Laws; understanding that sometimes lovies get lost.
2. Lovies are kept in each child’s cubby, personal belonging space, or classroom safe space, and only come out when a child needs comforting – this is determined by the child in behavior or words. You will be surprised at how this works as the child’s comfort level increases.
3. Teachers will make the emotional environment warm and respectful at all times so there is less opportunity for stress.
4. Teachers will make the educational environment stimulating and interesting – even fun – so children will be busy learning and need fewer stress reducers.
5. Teachers will pay attention to children and NOTICE when the child is NOT using the lovey. No need for an “I told you so” attitude, but just a statement of fact like, “Look at you singing all the words with us.” or “You used both hands to build that castle.” If you think a gentle & respectful reminder is needed, you can say something like a really neat grandma I met told me: “Sorry, Katie. Grandma doesn’t speak Passie-Talk.”

To Wean or Not to Wean

1. Pacifiers – NO. It is not our ‘call’ on when a child gives up his pacifier. The decision belongs to the child’s needs, the parent, the pediatrician, pediatric dentist, or speech therapist.
2. Baby Bottles – MAYBE. Still not our call, but a teacher may make a suggestion to a parent on this IF the bottle is a full time lovey and other children begin to emulate this and backtrack from using a cup.
3. Sippy Cups – Should be available all day, filled with water only because children’s brains (and ours) need hydration to relax and learn.
4. Baby Blankets – NO. the only concern with blankets is if they impede a child’s movement.
5. Toys From Home – Unless is it truly brought for security and comfort, LIMIT these to 1 small item only but see that it is stored and ‘used’ with the same procedures as other lovies.